I had a bad body image day.
In fact….I’ve had a few of those days recently….
I look in the mirror and I can’t help myself.
I can’t stop the thoughts running through my head.
And that feeling is all too familiar.
You should be thinner.
Your thighs shouldn’t rub together like they do.
That belly bloat is REAL today.
Your arms are getting bigger (you sure weightlifting is the thing you want to do?)
Your abs aren’t as tight as they should be for the lifestyle that you live.
The worthiness of what society has read to us.
Of what is acceptable.
The questioning of everything that you do….
You sure you want to eat that?
Maybe you should run just a little bit longer…..that cookie isn’t going to burn itself.
But what if diet culture is wrong?
In fact…they ARE wrong.
We are human beings.
We are not all meant to live in the same size body.
We are going to have bad body image days.
We will have confident days.
But what do we do in those times where we sink?
The times where we can barely look at ourselves in the mirror.
The times where we feel a little “less than?”
We just want to run and hide…..
Run to Ben n’ Jerry for emotional support?
How do you shift your mindset?
How do you get yourself to a place of love?
You hear it all over the place, “just love yourself”
But it’s a practice….easier said than done.
How do you “just love yourself?”
What’s the trick?
What am I missing?
These are the voices….
That would run through me
Through my mind
More often than I would like to admit.
But 3 years or so ago….I decided I had enough.
I was done dieting.
I was done forcing myself into a size body that I was not meant to live inside of.
I was done pretending.
Fake it til’ you make it they say….
I was done with that.
And even despite all of my inner work and developing a much more positive body image
I still have my days.
Days where I feel depleted.
Feeling a little “less than.”
And so here are my top tips to shifting your bad image day into a positive one.
Because let’s face it….
Feeling depleted and suffocated in that unworthiness feeling holds you back from truly living your life.
And that’s no fun for anyone.
But feeling good in your body will help you get to a place where
You can say NO and stop being tempted by this “just one last diet” mentality.
And feeling liberated doesn’t mean loving your body every second of every day….
But it will offer you the tools to fall back on in times that we feel a little “less than” so you can shift it rather quickly.
Tip #1 Stop. Drop. Step Back.
I mean it.
We all get the thoughts.
The negative beliefs.
The ones that cast a power over us….and it’s our choice to give into those thoughts.
We can choose to give our power away or we can grasp control.
So literally stop what you are doing.
Step back and look at yourself.
Look at that belief and ask yourself “is this true?”
Take a big deep breath and tell yourself that you will not let this thought run your day….and quite literally take your power back.
Tip #2 Ask yourself what triggered the negative body image thought?
We are all in a season of immense stress.
Anxiety of the unknown surrounding Covid 19.
Many of us are trying to figure out how they will pay for their mortgage let alone putting food on the table.
Women hold stress in their bodies.
We cast blame out on it.
Didn’t get the job?
Failed the test?
Got in a fight with your husband?
Must be your bodies fault.
You hit the gym or push for yet another diet to fix yet another “problem.”
Tip #3 It’s actually not about your weight
What was going on within your environment prior to the negative image thought?
Were you arguing with your kids?
Got into a heated argument with your boss?
Look at the external factors and really feel into them.
What may have triggered this thought?
Try to find love and compassion and choose kindness instead of rushing to the negative thought.
Tip #4 Switch it off
You will never love your body 100% of the time
I have my days
Everyone has their days
But understanding and having the tools to switch it off is where we find liberation.
I truly care about myself and my mental health….
And that means for me taking time just for me.
Where I get to be me.
Not mom. Not the wife. Not the coach. Just me.
I schedule it in the form of a morning routine.
In the form of a workout of some sort.
But it’s on my calendar.
Every. Single. Day.
It’s a non-negotiable for me.
When you can focus on taking care of YOU…..even on those bad image days….
Your body with say a big THANK YOU.
Tip #5 Ask yourself “What is my legacy?”
I read this somewhere once….
And it really hit me hard.
Do I want to be remembered for the countless diets, the times that I was “strong willed” and said no to the pizza,
No to the drinks, no to the tacos…..
Do I want to be remembered for how many hours I spent in the gym
Attempting to fit myself into this unrealistic mold that society told me I “should” be?
Or do I want to be remembered as a woman with a passion and a purpose to spread….
A woman full of kindness and joy?
Anytime you are feeling bad about yourself, ask yourself, “what is my legacy and what do I want to leave behind in this world?”
You have a purpose.
You have a reason.
You are MORE than your body.
Tip #6 What is your bad body image trying to teach you?
When your mind is filled with shame and self doubt,
Ask yourself what this could possibly be teaching you about yourself.
Then ask yourself WHO it is that you want to be?
WHO is the woman that you are going to allow yourself to be?
Write it down.
First….write it down in the voice of your ego.
That’s the initial thought that runs through you.
Second….write it down from the voice from your soul.
Your soul voice.
Who does SHE want to be?
Look at both of those answers and see where you might be feeling resistance or tension…
Where is it manifesting in your body?
Then whichever one doesn’t feel aligned with who you want to be…. rip that one up. Burn it.
Physically release it.
Tip #7 Self Sabotaging isn’t good for anyone
We all do it.
Beat ourselves up.
Talk down to ourselves.
Look in the mirror and pinch your body.
Like maybe if you just squeeze hard enough it’ll rip off.
We numb our emotions.
Easier to just put it to the side…..
We avoid getting to the core.
To dig internally to the why.
We don’t want to get uncomfortable….
But committing to the discomfort
Allows you to set them free.
And that is where you find liberation.
The bottom line:
You are worthy.
You are enough.
You are here for a reason.
You are so much more than your body.
Your body size does not define you.
Sending you all so much love and believing in you.